Love begets love. This was the theme
of the priest’s homily at Mass tonight, and interestingly the exact phrase I
had been contemplating in my own thoughts. Both the second reading today from 1
John (“Beloved, let us
love one another, because love is of God”) and the
Gospel from John (“love one another as I love you”) focus on the abundance that
comes from giving love. It spoke to me particularly today because for the first
time in a long time, I was in that open place at Mass where you can feel that
you are in the right place at the right time, hearing what you need to hear – a
connectedness to the Lord. I’ve been too tired and too anxious and too
overwhelmed by life recently to allow God in in that way. But Mother’s Day was
the perfect opening. I woke up this morning too early (my son bellowing for “Mommy”
with great gusto) and decided that rather than being annoyed, I was going to
think of this day as a chance to be the mom I want to be but rarely am. The morning
wasn’t easy – the combination of nearly terrible twoness and I think a lot of
stress and anxiety from our recent trans-Atlantic move has made for a not
always easy to deal with little person. But we got through calmly, time-outs
and all. And the day just blossomed – we had more fun together for longer
periods of time, we relaxed together, we saw friends together – rather than
worrying about getting things done (and there seriously is a lot to get done
right now), we just enjoyed each other, and it made everything better. I’m not
working currently, in a desire to get our new life settled and make sure my son
feels safe and secure, but for better or worse, the worries about if and when I’ll
work again have in many ways overwhelmed me too much to enjoy. But remembering
how joyful a day can be, and how many upsets and angry tantrums you can get
through when trying to see something from your child’s perspective and approach
them with love rather than frustration, cracked me open in a way I didn’t expect.
I can’t pretend I’m suddenly not worried or that tomorrow will be perfect, but
what the Lord taught us in word and example is always to try again to lead with
love, and that good will flow from it.
Wishing a
happy, peaceful, joy-filled Mother’s Day to all moms!
